ś it’s my birthday too ś ś [ imitating
guitar, drums ]
don’t do that, okay ? ś hey, jude– ś
just stop it, okay ? I mean, it’s really been
a shitty birthday for me. No offense, but I don’t need
a serenade right how. What’s wrong ? You didn’t
get anything good, or– I didn’t get shit.
Not even a “happy birthday.” My whole family
just sort of blew it off. I’d freak if my family
forgot my birthday.
It’s a brand-new year. I’m 16. Everything
should be platinum. I should be happy, right ?
Yeah. Well, I can’t get happy. It is physically impossible
for me to get happy. Would you feel better if you
knew one of my secrets, or– Don’t gross me out. No, we’re not talking
gross here. No. It’s–
it’s just embarrassing. [ exhaling ]
cannot leave this room, okay ? It would devastate
my reputation as a dude. No problem. [ clears throat ] I’ve never bagged a babe. I’m not a stud. [ giggling ] I got the rep
in sixth grade. And it, like,
it stuck with me. I’m still on hold. Look, I’d appreciate
you not laughing here, okay ?
[ laughing ] I’m sorry. That’s not what I meant. I meant– Hey, time out,
[ horn honking ] [ exhales ] Pardon me. It’s okay. I meant that it’s okay
that you did it once, But I didn’t mean
for you to do it again ! I’m sorry. [ sighing ]
sorry. You know,
just now I really felt
how much you like me. You’re probably zoning in
on my brain waves or something. Well, not really.
I felt it on my leg. Come on, I don’t
want to see it ! Oh. Sorry if I embarrassed you. I’m not embarrassed. Fresh breath’s a priority
in my life.